In this huge episode, Ned finds a new body, which triggers his big imagination. Not being one to let stature go to his head, Ned humbly dishes out advice for the little people.
This cat is Ned. Some say he is from an alternate reality where cat’s watch humans on the Internet all day. He lives with his feeder-servant Will.
Ned always wants to be there for Will, even when he’s in the bathroom or herding cattle:
Ned is very creative when it comes to passing time on any given day. See how he role-plays, naps and interacts with fruit here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3sUrjMXG8G0
While he is highly compassionate to telemarketers https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZLYSIDzgAk (which is why he’s much loved in India), he has little empathy toward dogs: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15HlAYX9Qcw&list=UUYKfUXHqAAzmUhuO3MZvsEg
Ned not only has impeccable hygiene but he also a great communicator when it comes to his litter box:
When Ned is emotionally frustrated he likes to express himself through interpretive dance, set to 80s music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kz5YBA_y0OA&list=PL_CIwgG4fkXOBNNynllX64_bxpnd0dSIi
As with most cats, Ned is nocturnal. He likes using this time to have meaningful discussions with Will and to research issues online: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXN0ej0eYCk&list=PL_CIwgG4fkXOBNNynllX64_bxpnd0dSIi
Catnip can influence Ned at times, like at new-year, when it make his resolutions become potentially scarring to the neighbourhood dogs:
For quality control reasons, Ned would like to categorically disassociate himself from the other cats of the Internet such as:
• Cats that chase laser pointers, because they’re gullible
• Cats that try to jump and slip and fall, because they embarrass the species
• Grumpy cat, because his attitude sucks
• Serious cat, because it’s not so serious
• Keyboard cats, because your rhythm is off
• Lolcats, because they’re not funny
• Cats that don’t mind dogs, because their taste sucks
• Mr Bigglesworth, because he looks freaky
• I can has cheezburger, because no dah you can..
• Cats that get a fright and jump into the air, because they should be prepared
• Cats with pumpkin helmets because it’s bad ear hygiene
• Furry fat faced cats, because they look ridiculous
• Funny cat videos, if they’re not very funny
• Cat compilations, because they diminish the viewers brain capacity
• Kittens of any kind, because they’re immature
• Cats in costumes because that is cat abuse
This week, Ned’s search history includes:
• Flannel shirt online sale
• How to make friends and look down on people
• What??? Bangladesh just beat England in the world cup cricket.. what’s cricket?
• Cat growth hormone